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Short Update

It’s been really hard to write even this short note, but I am finally doing it.

The adoption fell through and we are going through a tough time. I’m getting help for both my mind and body, as my body is having some reactions to everything, but we need a bit of time to work through everything and get back to a neutral state of mind again. I promise I’ll be back to the blog as soon as I am better. I sincerely appreciate all of the encouragement and care that has been given throughout our long journey, and look forward to a clear mind and creating again.

To end on a better note, I’m closing with a picture of our newly taken in stray kittens, Bella and Zane, being all adorably snuggly.

Clovers Anyone?

Yep, I totally went there for my Celtic Thunder post.  *cracking up*  I will not apologize for it either, since I absolutely love a well fitting kilt on a man, and we got to see several of them wearing them.  *happy sigh* Hey, I’d sigh over the big guy wearing one too, but that’ll never happen, so it’s my burden to sigh at Irishmen wearing them.  *smirk*  (Just a heads up, this will be a picture laden post, so loading may take a little extra time than usual.)

 

For an overnight trip, it feels like so much happened!  I was still on a high from having just met Kiddo in person at our meeting and from our nightly phone calls.  Plus, I got to dress up in my new leather jacket and booties, and I even put on a bit of makeup (although I think I shivered it all off by the time the pictures were taken *laugh*).  I tried, which actually means I put a lot of effort into dressing for the concert.  We got to go their concert in 2016, so I was determined to make this “as a new mom” with my mom time even better.

 

It started with an overnight stay at The Courtyard by Marriott, in Salina.  Absolutely gorgeous and very clean; I actually got to watch another room get cleaned and they strip the beds all the way down, etc., so it’s truly clean and that makes me a loyal customer.  Just check out the basic two queens room…

 

We went to this random chicken restaurant that looked like a small mom-and-pop-type and had the best comfort food ever!  Beef, mashed potatoes, and gravy open-faced sandwich, along with real baked beans on the side.  *sigh*

Comfort food

 

We got ready and arrived early, since last time it was so packed, but we underestimated how cold it would become and that they wouldn’t let us wait in the lobby even once it dipped below forty.  I tried to distract us for a while by talking about Kiddo’s meeting, calls, and Mom’s parenting advice, and then with Snapchat filters and pictures.

Cool Rider

 

Hot Mama

 

Mom and I Beary Happy

 

Once we finally got in, got souvenirs right off the bat, we found our seats just a few rows back from the stage.  I did an excellent job of fighting the downed server in the first minutes the early group was allowed to buy tickets last year!  Look how close we were to the stage!

These aren’t even zoomed in.   When Ryan from CT reached out his hand to the audience, it seemed like I could almost touch it.  Holy smokes!

 

The Theatre itself has amazing architecture and is a wonder to look at while waiting, too!

Stiefel Theatre

Stiefel Theatre

Balcony 1

Balcony 1

Balcony 2

Balcony 2

Stained Glass Light

Stained Glass Light

 

 

As expected their X tour concert was phenomenal, with a mix of Oldies, some of their original songs, and even covers of current songs, such as Galway Girl© by Ed Sheeran, covered by Damian McGinty (ah-maz-ing as they dramatically say).  Seasons in the Sun© and The Streets of London© both brought tears to our eyes, while Bye Bye Baby© and I’m a Believer© were so much fun to sing along with.  This time there were only four of the guys, but they did a fantastic job still, were just as good if not better than their DVD performance of the first concert for the tour, and were so engaging.  I sincerely hope they come back in 2020, so it can be three generations of us singing Ireland’s Call© as the concert closes.

 

You know what makes it even better?  My daughter wore hers to bed the first night and put it back on anytime she was in the house.  It was awesome to see her all sleepy eyed in her new shirt that she didn’t want to take off.  Between the new mom with established mom conversations, a spot of Christmas shopping, a phenomenal concert that included kilts, and then rushing home to go get my daughter, that was the best two-day concert trip I’ve ever had.  A sleepy eyed daughter wearing her Celtic Thunder tee was the whipped topping for my dessert of blessings.

 

By the way, if you’re interested or curious, you can check Celtic Thunder out on YouTube, their website, and Amazon (plus others probably, but these are the ones I can personally vouch for).  If you’re an Amazon Music Unlimited member, most of their work is available, too!

 

Kiddo’s going to help me make a special wall hanging from the concert once I get the pics all printed, to go with the concert book and such.  😀  I haven’t yet brought her over to the Celtic side, but she was pretty preoccupied with her new tablet to listen to my music, so I’m going to try a little I’m a Believer© on her when she comes back very soon while school is out.  Then I’ll get my own lucky charm to help me decide on which style tattoo I’m going to do to celebrate her completing our forever family.  🙂

“Mom”

We had our first home visit with Kiddo, which even included us doing the long drive down to pick her up instead of Transport. We got a little extra time to visit before the drive lulled her to sleep until we were about 40 minutes from home. She picked Taco Bell for a quick dinner, since it was getting late, and then we headed on home. I got her settled in and she loves her bedroom as is, despite my horrible paint job and frequent offers that we can change anything. There was a little visiting and the poor young lady passed out in her new bed.

First thing after brunch it was time to unpack all of the rest of the doll clothes and now she has several outfits for her doll, including PJs which went on overnight), learning how to use her Fire tablet, and setting up her own music playlist for Alexa to play. I learned a lot about a boy singer that is apparently hotter than the sun *grin*, how to tune out JoJo while still listening to my daughter, and about how cool Swift still is. And then I learned a lot about playing horse farm games, which was one of the sweetest evenings ever.

Instead of our Spa Day, we hit the city and ate at a restaurant, where I introduced her to Snapchat filters and got a ton of pictures with her, and finally got her to take some silly pictures, too. When she saw a Christmas inflatable of Olaf that she just loved, the big guy wordlessly bought it. *grin* Me thinks daddy feelings are starting to brew, but I’m not saying that, since he would never say that, you know what I mean? *wink*

She also said it’d be best for the two stray kittens to be brought in Saturday to stay in her room as they acclimate and get trained, before joining our older cats. Kiddo absolutely loves them and one is specifically hers. *grin* She even played a cat app on her tablet for the kittens to bat at electronic mice. It was so adorable to see her with them. They are pretty cute, I admit. Greetings from Zane and Bella…

We spent breakfast with Larry and then back to spend time with the kittens, plus time for some more gaming. (Mini me!!) We even snuggled in bed for a short nap, which was one of the most beautiful times of my life. I decided we should get things gathered and go to the living room about half an hour before Transport was due, just to be able to confirm she had everything. And Transport arrives almost immediately after we enter the living room. After the signing, taking her things out to the car, and waving while watching her go, I had an unexpected breakdown. I didn’t expect the first home visit goodbye to be so hard. Every one of those adoption sayings were absolutely true. I had all ready loved my unknown child, but I had quickly fallen in (motherly) love with this creative, unique, and beautiful young lady.

I sent a text with the picture of the kittens doing well to her foster father to share, so that she could see they’re all right, and I got a reply back from her. It started off as “Hi Mom…”. A few hours later and I’m tearing up again. *sappy smile* I didn’t expect her to refer to me as Mom for a long time, so my heart is so overflowing with joy. My blessings are overflowing, despite a few issues with my health. I always wanted to be a mom and to someday hear it, and had nearly given up on that lifelong wish, and my incredible daughter blessed me with my last “life long wish” tonight. Life is good tonight and I had to share that, since it’s been a long time since I’ve been able to wholeheartedly say that. As they say in a movie, I am incandescently happy. (Or close. I still am, regardless. Lol)

I wish you joy and peace tonight, plus promise to write soon about the amazing Celtic Thunder concert I got back from the day we brought Kiddo home for her visit. 🙂

I Can Only Imagine©™

img_4249-2

 

I watched the title movie a couple of days before we got notified that we were picked for the adoption and have listened to the song for some time all ready.  It lives in my Absolute Faves Right Now playlist.  While puttering around, working on projects to finish before Kiddo comes over soon, I realized that the song applies in other, just as deep, ways.  I knew that it would be the biggest blessing to find and be approved for our forever daughter.  I didn’t know that there are so many blessings just following that even and I’m in awe of what God has been gifting me with.  Within a couple of days I’ve gotten to talk to my daughter (my daughter!) twice over the phone.  She got distracted at times, but hearing her and talking about things she likes to do or what foods she likes…I had tears in my eyes and my heart swelled like the Grinch’s®; way too big to fit in my little body.  The excitement in her voice about trying things she saw we had done or have that were in the scrapbook about us that I made a long time ago for her; the sadness when she learned Bo had passed away since the book was made; how she can’t wait to learn to scrapbook like this and do crafts with me…I couldn’t have imagined that these “little” moments could be such blessings that I would never have guessed at.  God protected such beautiful gifts for when we finally got matched.

 

Finding out that we’ll get to meet this next weekend and get to have two stay overs with us next month…I can only imagine how these will affect us down into our souls.  How would we have ever guessed that we would be blessed to have her stay for Thanksgiving break and move in with a few days to spare before Christmas, to be part of our family forever?  Unlike the question in the song, I’ve sang Hallelujah while crying the happiest tears of my life and I’ve been rendered speechless by the beauty of this blessing God is sharing with us.  In about two and a half months we will have our daughter.  After the past few years I can’t even express the awe that we will get to transition her into our home so quickly.  It’s mere weeks, realistically!  Just months ago I wondered what my purpose in life was; why I had survived the attempted murder.  A few months later God gave us a new path to walk full of love and learning that our purpose is to make this young lady happy and feel the start of  our forever love,  and completely change our priorities to spend the rest of our lives helping her to have the happiest life she can.  Preparing for the hard times and crying happy tears while hugging over the good ones.  It’s hard to imagine that the answer would come in such an incredible way.

 

I had fun over the past two years collecting gifts for her.  I had no idea that buying the additional Christmas gifts that are specific to her interests would be such an adventure!  I get to go to my long awaited concert and the night I come back my daughter will sleep in her bed for the first time in an over-sized concert tee for her nightgown.  I could never have imagined how these little things would feel.

 

And the soaring of my heart when we all agreed, even her foster father, that internet class based homeschooling is the right thing for her at this time.  She needs that one-on-one time and teaching, plus we get to take trips to help make things like history a real concept instead of something in a book, while still also being able to keep up with schoolwork on the computer when away from home!  Plus, there’s built in socialization along with the gradual socialization we have planned – kind of like a dart board.  The bulls-eye is the core support system we thankfully have.  Once she’s comfortable and settled, we will expand out a bit to the next circle of friends and family, and then we will expand to school-organized events, socializing with other kids going to the same homeschool, meeting more distantly connected people, etc.  I’m very thankful that God worked with our Social Worker to make our dreams of how best to help our child work out.  It’ll also give some much needed bonding time, as well, which she definitely deserves a lot of.

 

Anyway, I’ve been in a flurry of preparing the house, going through cabinets to try to change things to what will work for her dietary needs, and wrapping all of the Christmas presents that were waiting in her room, since we were told to not hold out hope for success this year.  Plus, a lot of notes to transcribe to put in my other adoption binder, to have on hand in case we need to refer to her history, etc.  I’m also painting wood to become shelves for her room and a shoe rack.  Might as well utilize my joyful energy.  Who would have guessed that I’d get a few extra spoons after talking to my daughter?!  On the flip side, I have a lot of time I get distracted by the awe of it all and just sit in prayer or meditation, thankful of these beautiful raindrops of blessings from the big blessing.  *soft smile*

 

In the meantime, I won’t get as much written, but you’re along for the glorious ride and my asking y’all advice for which type of gift is a better option, since most of you are established parents.  I’m not above asking for help.  *grin*  So pamper on, and I wish you the joy of raindrops of blessings until I can next sit down and gather my mind.  🙂

 

My Christmas Wish

My most earnest Christmas wish for this year was for us to get matched to Kiddo and have our first “forever family” Christmas. Today we were blessed with the notification that we were picked in the BIS meeting and by the Regent, and we start lining our ducks in a row this Thursday!!

I’m still in shock, I think. I start something and go sit down. After a while I remember I was doing something, go move an item or complete the task, and sit down again to just stare into space. *laugh* I spend time thinking about Christmas, since our Social Worker believes we’ll definitely have Kiddo moved in by then and able to celebrate with us (if not, daring to hope, sooner). Sometimes I wonder how those first minutes are going to be. Will they be awkward, tearfully happy, a bit of both…? And I need to get her suitcase for that first meeting, still, because my daughter isn’t putting her belongings in a trash bag to move. The knowledge that it occurs still tears me up.

In a couple days we get to go over the transition plan, which includes meeting Kiddo in person, visiting on her turf, and bringing her here for some overnighters. It varies with every situation, so who knows if it’ll take her a while to feel comfortable enough to stay overnight or if we’re all running headlong into family life.

So, although I’ve been working on product a lot (and having some EPIC fails!), those plans are getting set aside. I have some fun ones to add to my site now, but lots of my new ideas are going to wait for mother/daughter project times now. I have fun creating product, even when I fail horribly, but we’ve waited so many years for this blessing that my business is going back to being a craft now. I’ll share some of the fails with you soon, just for a good laugh and to mourn with me how pretty they looked at first. *laugh* Once I know Kiddo’s preferences I need to make some gifts for her. I also am about to hit the manic housewife mode that I need to get my house into some serious order. *grin* Do you remember when I mentioned how I have a hard time dealing with emotions? You add excitement and nerves together, and suddenly our home is good enough for us but not for bringing in Kiddo. Anyone want to paint some boards with me, take things down the ladder into the basement, or steam clean my living room? *laugh*

Beyond the insanity, it’s been a beautiful day of sharing our news. I appreciate every person who has been encouraging, uplifting, and travelled this journey with us. And for those of you who are involved and so excited, thank you for being part of this. We couldn’t have kept going if it wasn’t for all of you. Who would have thought I’d actually get my Christmas wish early? Now that I’m getting all girly and emotional I’m going to go move things around, and then sit back down again for awhile. I think Jacksepticeye is perfect for tonight’s dazed mind.

Until next time, I wish you joy and blessings. 🙂

Christmas shopping

I did a search and couldn’t find that I mentioned this right before we lost the internet, so I’m hoping this is new information from you.  You’ve probably heard of the Wish app, where you shop vendors at really low prices, pay almost an even amount for shipping, and wait a long time to get these little packages from China.  I learned about another app, Joom, that has no shipping charges and their items have been a lot better quality than most Wish ones, so far, in my opinion.

 

Now, I know some are going to be like “seriously, Christmas shopping in September?!  That’s going too far!”.  Stay with me here though.  For $30 I got a bunch of stocking stuffers (which have some of my best purchases for people usually).  Then try to forget about it and the packages slowly come in.  Due to the massive delays, I’d advise you check it out as soon as possible if you’re interested in some interesting, cost effective little items!

 

I do have a few bits of advise though.  One, the sizes are usually incredibly off on the clothing, so read reviews or may the odds be with you.  Two, use the app if possible – the website is much harder to navigate in my opinion.  In addition, the app immediately checks that you want to pay in US dollars instead of other currencies, so it’s a LOT less frustrating.  Three, if you’re considering makeup, see if there is a screenshot or list of ingredients, because knock offs sometimes have some bad chemicals mixed in, so just be aware (goes for any outlet type shopping).

 

They even have a section where you can enter a lottery for select items for that day, to get them for just $0.10, with the caveat that you need to do a photograph-containing review on the item.  I haven’t won all week, but I’m noticing that I kind of set myself up for loss anyway.  I was selecting items that a lot of people were in the raffle for, so I’m watching that number of other entries more now.  We’ll see if I might get a fun and wild wig or piece of jewelry this way.  *laugh*

 

So, I definitely recommend you at least take a look and see if anything appeals to you.  I even found a bunch of business items that are really inspiring me (unfortunately the most inspiring item is not here and it’s been almost two months – see, that’s why you need to order early!).  The only really bad side I’ve found so far is that it’s incredibly addictive.  That thrill of getting a great deal is almost nonstop, especially with “item of the hour” flash sales with things for $1 or such.  *grin* Hopefully this will help some people have a more cost effective holiday while still having lots of fun (check out the Harry Potter alloy wands if you have a Potterhead to shop for; looks so pretty but is a phenomenal price!).

 

This is definitely one of my favorite apps.  Makes for a rather random blog post, but that’s what makes me interesting, right?  *laugh* Who knows what the next one will be about, but for now, happy pampering (and shopping!)! 🙂

Happy Birthday Virgos

L and B 9 11 18 Boudouire_097

 

Happy Birthday to all those Virgos out there!  

 

I’m sorry for the radio silence since the internet went out.  All sorts of stuff went on, between my laptop starting to go out, internet going back out; all those great moments in life that make you say meh and hide away until the next day.  Next thing you know it’s been quite a while since you’ve blogged.  *grin* I have managed to make several pieces of product that I’m actually sending over to a favorite show in Ireland, plus Christmas items, and had a LOT of failures while making product recipes.  *laugh*

 

While I’m at it, this is the least enthusiastic I’ve ever felt about my birthday, honestly.  My mind is pulled too many directions, plus it was recently the twentieth anniversary of miscarrying Sierra, which has a lot more emotional impact than just another middling birthday.  It’s a step closer to the fortieth, which is a little less enthusiastic than even this one.  *laugh* It’ll make figuring up my age easier for the doctor’s office, at least.  If you ever wonder about why I’m so critical with myself or analyse everything, just read the definition of a Virgo.  I’m the epitome of the nerdy one.  *grin*

 

One super huge event that has taken up most of my thoughts while off is that the BIS meeting happened for our hopeful daughter.  We’ll know in a month or so how the results came out, so it’s a dual-edged sword; there’s finally a time frame for expectations, but now there’s a chance that in four or so weeks I may learn that we weren’t selected for this daughter that I felt for as soon as I read her profile.  It’s been just the two of us rattling around in this home for so long that it’s hard to imagine another person, especially when it’s not one that has grown up into our family, but is a mini-adult with us all jumping into massive changes.  I can imagine her at Christmas, making product with me, and going through schoolwork together.  I’m trying to not be excited, since our SW made it sound like it went very favorably, but we’ve been burned so much by our experiences.  Parts of me can’t help but think if we have at least visitation by Christmas I’m turning our home into a mini-Branson.  *laugh* Make a freaking Winter Wonderland for the first Christmas with our daughter, plus it’ll be such a memorable time with the family anyway.  Needless to say, I’ve had a lot of self-editing of my emotions and thoughts, but the hamsters are still pretty lost in the ideas and hope, honestly.

 

Anyway, I’m back with my new laptop, improved internet connection, and five injuries I’m recovering from.  *laugh* Bengay is considered pampering too, right?  😉

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