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Once in a Lifetime

Things have been downright crazy while preparing for the upcoming ceremony, and I had a moment this morning to sit and try to figure out how it could seem like there is so much more to this than my first wedding. And then it dawned on me. In just 3 days we will be hosting a once in a lifetime event, at least for almost all attending or watching. In America we don’t often see Celtic traditional ceremonies and activities. St. Patrick’s Day here is very different and definitely nothing akin to traditional. I’m not putting that down, so don’t get me wrong please. It’s kind of awesome that we put our own spin (or flavor, as Little Man says sometimes) to things. With our common ancestry and interests, having my dream celebration of a traditional Handfasting is nearly mind blowing. 😁 With this being so different than anything that is usually done around here, it’s a lot more complicated, and that’s before you consider the kids, transportation logistics, etc. *laugh* I mean, we literally practiced and wrote out detailed instructions of how to do the cord binding during the ceremony, to provide to the officiant. This may be a celebration and not a legal event, but we all know me…I’ve researched all that I can, pulled out the parts that work for us and adapted as needed, and have every last detail in a list (or 4, depending on which type of list – to do on specific days, responsibilities, foods, overall checklist, yeah…I know, I have a problem. Lol

Thank goodness for The Knot and their app. Although I had to tweak things to all get out because this isn’t a wedding, it has reminded me of so many details I might have forgotten and keeps me on track when I overlook one of my written lists, plus it has a running guest list along with tracking gifts and thank yous sent. (Dude, how handy is that, especially if you kind of suck at writing and mailing those usually?!)

Anyway, we finished up a lot of the big things that can be done ahead of time and it’s now a waiting game to be able to do specific things on specific days, like buying perishables, picking up items from the bakery, etc. While texting tips and discussing the binding with my mom and our officiant, it really sank in that we will never be a part of or see something like this again in our lifetimes. That’s kind of awesome, IMO. Cord binding during a Handfasting, personal vows spoken (or slaughtered, if the person knows Irish Gaelig *laugh* – trying super hard to say the words correctly though, I promise!), and then decor that is completely about us. Absolutely none of your usual decorations. There are Phantom of the Opera, The Nightmare Before Christmas, Grinch, Harry Potter, and the list goes on…along with framed printouts of traditional phrases and how to say them, details about Celtic traditions, and then the fact that our ancestors trace back to the same spot in Ireland (and a few others in Europe, although at different times). It’s truly become a celebration of us.

I think it’s really easy to get caught up in what is popular or “normal”, and put the guests’ possible opinions ahead of our own when planning things. I nearly fell down that rabbit hole, but that’s where our personalities help balance each other out. That and he chills me out when I get all detail psycho and worked up. *laugh* I’m thankful that we entered this part of our journey sideways, so to speak, which made sure that we will have a super unique and individualized event. Certain individuals are unable to attend and their absence is felt keenly, but I’m thankful that I get to share everything leading up to it and then highlights of the day, thanks to the latest technology. We live in a remarkable time that allows us to really embrace life’s journey and share it with those we love. (And now mask free!)

Anyway, I just felt a desire to share my awe with you. Life seems so ordinary, and downright difficult sometimes, that it’s so beautiful that we, and our guests and incredible helpers, will get to be a part of such a once in a lifetime event. All the way down to dancing The Wobble, which was requested, because I’m all ready a “weeble wobble” due to my illness, so I don’t plan to dance ever again to something that challenges that. *cracking up* The generosity of spirit shown, the understanding of trying to build a new home from two divided ones, and having such a strong support system develop through this has made it all the more amazing. And I must say, there is nothing as “oh, I got something in my eye” inducing as a ten year old saying they can’t wait for the ceremony that bonds you as a family, and that special shy smile when they hear that you made sure that the song that’s an inside joke for just the two of you will be played even though it doesn’t really fit as a dance-type of song. It’s been 9 months of “firsts” and I’m blessed that I get to be part of such a unique event that keeps those firsts coming, when I used to think that my disability was a death sentence. 😊 God bless the Celtic Knot of life’s journey. 😉

I Can Only Imagine©™

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I watched the title movie a couple of days before we got notified that we were picked for the adoption and have listened to the song for some time all ready.  It lives in my Absolute Faves Right Now playlist.  While puttering around, working on projects to finish before Kiddo comes over soon, I realized that the song applies in other, just as deep, ways.  I knew that it would be the biggest blessing to find and be approved for our forever daughter.  I didn’t know that there are so many blessings just following that even and I’m in awe of what God has been gifting me with.  Within a couple of days I’ve gotten to talk to my daughter (my daughter!) twice over the phone.  She got distracted at times, but hearing her and talking about things she likes to do or what foods she likes…I had tears in my eyes and my heart swelled like the Grinch’s®; way too big to fit in my little body.  The excitement in her voice about trying things she saw we had done or have that were in the scrapbook about us that I made a long time ago for her; the sadness when she learned Bo had passed away since the book was made; how she can’t wait to learn to scrapbook like this and do crafts with me…I couldn’t have imagined that these “little” moments could be such blessings that I would never have guessed at.  God protected such beautiful gifts for when we finally got matched.

 

Finding out that we’ll get to meet this next weekend and get to have two stay overs with us next month…I can only imagine how these will affect us down into our souls.  How would we have ever guessed that we would be blessed to have her stay for Thanksgiving break and move in with a few days to spare before Christmas, to be part of our family forever?  Unlike the question in the song, I’ve sang Hallelujah while crying the happiest tears of my life and I’ve been rendered speechless by the beauty of this blessing God is sharing with us.  In about two and a half months we will have our daughter.  After the past few years I can’t even express the awe that we will get to transition her into our home so quickly.  It’s mere weeks, realistically!  Just months ago I wondered what my purpose in life was; why I had survived the attempted murder.  A few months later God gave us a new path to walk full of love and learning that our purpose is to make this young lady happy and feel the start of  our forever love,  and completely change our priorities to spend the rest of our lives helping her to have the happiest life she can.  Preparing for the hard times and crying happy tears while hugging over the good ones.  It’s hard to imagine that the answer would come in such an incredible way.

 

I had fun over the past two years collecting gifts for her.  I had no idea that buying the additional Christmas gifts that are specific to her interests would be such an adventure!  I get to go to my long awaited concert and the night I come back my daughter will sleep in her bed for the first time in an over-sized concert tee for her nightgown.  I could never have imagined how these little things would feel.

 

And the soaring of my heart when we all agreed, even her foster father, that internet class based homeschooling is the right thing for her at this time.  She needs that one-on-one time and teaching, plus we get to take trips to help make things like history a real concept instead of something in a book, while still also being able to keep up with schoolwork on the computer when away from home!  Plus, there’s built in socialization along with the gradual socialization we have planned – kind of like a dart board.  The bulls-eye is the core support system we thankfully have.  Once she’s comfortable and settled, we will expand out a bit to the next circle of friends and family, and then we will expand to school-organized events, socializing with other kids going to the same homeschool, meeting more distantly connected people, etc.  I’m very thankful that God worked with our Social Worker to make our dreams of how best to help our child work out.  It’ll also give some much needed bonding time, as well, which she definitely deserves a lot of.

 

Anyway, I’ve been in a flurry of preparing the house, going through cabinets to try to change things to what will work for her dietary needs, and wrapping all of the Christmas presents that were waiting in her room, since we were told to not hold out hope for success this year.  Plus, a lot of notes to transcribe to put in my other adoption binder, to have on hand in case we need to refer to her history, etc.  I’m also painting wood to become shelves for her room and a shoe rack.  Might as well utilize my joyful energy.  Who would have guessed that I’d get a few extra spoons after talking to my daughter?!  On the flip side, I have a lot of time I get distracted by the awe of it all and just sit in prayer or meditation, thankful of these beautiful raindrops of blessings from the big blessing.  *soft smile*

 

In the meantime, I won’t get as much written, but you’re along for the glorious ride and my asking y’all advice for which type of gift is a better option, since most of you are established parents.  I’m not above asking for help.  *grin*  So pamper on, and I wish you the joy of raindrops of blessings until I can next sit down and gather my mind.  🙂

 

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